The Gay Uncle provides another report on his sister Roxy’s good friend A-M. You might remember A-M from a long-ago post on providing a name for her newborn-ish son, or for the one on this cranially blessed baby boy. Well, that darling little head case is about nine months old now, and is both teething and breast feeding, as most kids that age do. A-M has been somewhat distressed of late, as her son has been occasionally using his newly developed chompers to clamp down on some of her more sensitive bits. “He’s driving me crazy with the biting,” A-M told Gunc’s sister. “So the last time he did it, I’d had enough. I took matters into my own hand, and finally bit him back.” Roxy stared, flabbergasted. “What?” A-M said. “You gotta’ show ’em who’s boss sometimes or they take advantage.” Roxy nodded, walked away, and immediately called her brother and asked him if he thought this was an appropriate response to an infant’s behavior. “Um. I don’t think so,” the Gay Uncle said.
Well, the next time the G.U. spoke with Roxy, after their usual catch up, he asked how A-M’s boobs were faring. “She’s doing okay,” Roxy said. “Jorrdan’s not clamping down as much as he was–maybe the bite-back was effective? Though the other day at work, she had the baby there, as well as her nine year-old daughter, Ambrosia. A-M was taking a break to nurse and deal wit the kids, and all the sudden I heard her squawk from the break room; the baby bit her again. She looked down at the boy, tensed up her hand into a fist, and screamed Hey. Cut it out, asshole!. Her daughter was right there, and she looked at her mom, forlorn and protective. Mom. Don’t call my baby brother an asshole!” To which A-M apparently shrugged, and replied. “Well, tell the little asshole to stop fucking biting me then.”