The Gay Uncle spent the entire day at the L.A. Auto Show working the convention center for his Vanity Fair car column Stick Shift, a practice that involved absolutely no children (unless you count the hundreds of other overgrown boys–and the occasional girl–running around, getting in an out of every available vehicle.) But after the show, he had drinks with his friends Kate and Dylan and their two kids Max, 6 and Athena, 3, and while discussing the show (and being shown some of Max’s own favorite toy cars) Kate told him what it was like to bring a child to such an event. Apparently, she’d attended the New York Auto Show a few years before with Max. As with most Auto Shows there were a number of demonstration games (Volvo’s “Safety City” being the G.U.’s favorite this year in L.A., wherein one is instructed to crash into the rear of various computer generated vehicles) there to lure in kids of all ages. After waiting in line for what seemed like hours, she and Max finally made it to the front. The boy was enjoying playing around with the game, which involved trying to get a Volkswagen up to its top speed. But, being slightly competitive, Kate didn’t feel he was succeeding. “Go faster,” she kept instructing from the sidelines. “Faster. Faster. Go faster, Max.” Her son attempted but still didn’t meet his mother’s standards. So, standing over him, she tried to get him to push harder on the pedal. “The one. On this side.” She pointed at his feet, which dangled somewhat helplessly above the controls (he could either see the screen, or press the pedals, but not both.) “No. Harder, Max. Push this pedal harder. HARDER.” Finally, the boy’s car icon came to a screeching halt and crashed sideways into a banked wall. His turn was over. He was sad. Kate was disappointed. “It was only after we left the exhibit that I realized, I had been telling him to push the wrong pedal the entire time. He was trying to hit the gas, and I was screaming at him to press the brake.” She sighed. “I still have nightmares about that moment all the time.”