Junk Food Loonie

The Gay Uncle believes that kids should eat healthy, balanced meals. He believes that they should be physically active and allowed plenty of time for free play and exploration instead of being locked in the “safety” of their homes. When he ran his own preschool, he even went so far as to institute a no junk rule for kids’ lunches, which was enforced with patronizing notes to parents, and the removal of offending items–returned to the parents, along with the patronizing note, at day’s end. (It worked.) But he also believes that kids are entitled to a certain amount of junk, and need exposure to it in order to develop a healthy relationship with food. Think of it on the vaccine model. (For a very intelligent explanation as to why, check out his seminal article “In Praise of Junk”.) So you know what really burns him up? This lady, the appropriately named MeMe Roth, who has been on a rampage against birthday cupcakes in the tri-state area recently, to deleterious effect (for her, and her kids, mostly). He’s not proposing that some of her issues are without merit. (He hates Santa too.) Or even that there’s some sort of crisis in our food system. What he’s suggesting is that she fucking chill out before she gives herself a coronary.

Repeat after Gunc: cupcakes are not instruments of the devil. They’re a treat. And like everything that falls in that category–cookies, Flaming Hot Cheetos, The Real Housewives of New York–they’re best consumed occasionally, and in moderation. If we teach kids these skills, they learn them. If we wave our hands around and scream about them and write declarative and inflammatory emails in ALL CAPS, we alienate everyone and our message is not heard.