The Gay Uncle’s family members are amazing in many ways. They’re intelligent, talented, funny, and successful. Some are musicians. Some tend bar. Some are nearly finished discovering the precise chemical formula for a once-a-day pill that will cure all forms of cancer. Oh, and some just happen to be tiny toddler BMX prodigies. (Click HERE to find out what the hell this means.) G.U. thinks that if he can tape this kid going around the track a few more times at speed, wearing camouflage shorts and a Palin Sux t-shirt and screaming Go Barack! at the top of his lungs, and set the whole video to the tune of Barracuda, he’ll have created both an internet sensation, and a means to finally seal up the election for the Big O. His other thought: take pledges from readers for each lap his three year-old cousin completes on his next Sunday bicycle ride, and donate the proceeds to the campaign. His final thought: tell GUG fans that this kid will not be allowed to get off his teensy two-wheeler until they donate a hundred-thousand dollars for CHANGE, and then sit back and watch the money pour in. Give Now before little Riley throws up, pops a flat, or really damages his inner ear with all that annular motion.