Brett Berk

The Gay Uncle and his youthful ward Tal were over at a friend’s house the other night, having dinner with her and her two kids, Lucian, 5 and Gregor, 9. The Guncles’ arrival seems to always bring out the boys…performative side. Last time they were over, the brothers enacted a musical routine with a toy drum, a piano, and a glockenspiel that was equal parts Noh, and No-Doubt. This time, it was puppets.

There were two shows. The first was pretty standard psycho-dramatic fare featuring a bullying narrative, in which an evil white paper-bag bully, after pounding relentlessly on a number of white paper-bag victims, gets his comeuppance. But it was the second show that really captured the G.U.’s attention. This one began in the 19th Century, and featured two white paper bag puppets who ruled over a crowd of brown paper bag puppets. The brown bags kept demanding their freedom, and were rebuked by the whites, until they were led into emancipation by a charismatic sack who was exactly half brown and half white. This play ended with three codas. The first fast-forwarded into the year 3016, and featured a future in which no one recognized skin (paper?) color as an issue. The second went back to January 20, 2009, and featured the half-and-half bag taking the oath of office to be the president (causing the assembled adult audience to tear up a little.) But it was the third that was the funniest. This one took place in the present day, in “Alaska, at the Governor’s office” and featured a white bag puppet with rectangular glasses and a down-home, female voice. “Servant,” the woman said to a brown bag, “can you bring around the car? I need to go shopping for some more fancy clothes? And while you’re at it, open my window shades. I need to see Russia.” The brown bag (and the audience) paid her no mind. Gunc’s friend turned to him. “Can’t wait to watch her on Dancing With The Stars. You think it’ll be next season, or the one after that?”