Brett Berk

Suddenly, the Gay Uncle read this morning, the New York Times is all about how the era of “Helicopter” parenting–in which mothers and fathers hover and obsess over their child’s every decision–might be coming to an end. But what have they chosen to replace it with? A new, invented trend. “Bad” parenting, in which parents confess to having needs of their own, live social lives outside of their children’s, and hold concerns that go beyond the quality and quantity of their child’s shit.

This doesn’t sound like “Bad” parenting to Gunc. This sounds like “sane” parenting. So long as these so called bad parents maintain some adherence to the idea that raising a kid requires it to be, if not your #1 priority, at least in the top 3. (Having it be your SOLE priority is where the problems tend to come in–for parent and child alike.)

The G.U. would like to propose that the parenting pendulum does not have to swing between the twin poles of all-in attachment, and Valium-addled neglect. Bandwagons depart for greener pastures. Helicopters crash. Negligence leads to jail time. The Gay Uncle believes in BALANCE (and in understanding how kids work and what they need). Say it with him: “I am a parent and a person.” Now remind yourself of Gunc’s mantra: “Pretend you’re the grownup.” Now, go do your job.