Brett Berk

While the number of women with kids is in decline–having a rather obvious correlative effect on birth rates–there is apparently a “bright spot” out there for those of you who think that extending the glorious rein of human beings on this earth is a good idea: single men having babies. They usually need a little help with this process, either enlisting a surrogate or adopting–in both cases, requiring a woman–but they’re raising the motherless packets of joy on their own. And once they develop their daddy-legs, it seems most of them aren’t particularly interested in coupling up and sharing the task. Like with most other things–TV remotes, masturbating, cooking–guys prefer to have complete control. Some of these #1 dads are gay, some are straight, and some are…Ricky Martin, who’s having twins via gestational outsourcing, so this drive is not just confined to one sexual community. The most successful (parent-wise) among them–as with all other parents–are those who are willing to enlist help from friends, family members, and paid employees, allowing them to gain perspective, maintain their Fantasy Football League commitments, and generally burst out of their Parenting Bubbles.

As you know, the Gay Uncle doesn’t personally believe in reproducing: unless you’ve figured out how to build a baby with gills, radiation resistance, and integrated UV blockers. (While he believes strongly in HOPE during this election cycle, he’s a bit more cynical about the longer-term future.) But he totally supports those of you who are more optimistic, vain, or in need of something cute and cuddly (and cry-y) around the house. So if you’re one of these partnerless partriarchs, and you’ve gone ahead and paid the $100,000 it costs to plant your seed in a suitable carrier, you can certainly afford to spend another $13.95 to pick up a copy of his book, so when Junior is born, at least you won’t totally ruin the little darling.