The one single maternal holiday is over. And just like the morning after your wedding or promotion or birthday, the blessed event has transpired, and you’re left feeling…HOW? There are those lucky folks for whom special occasions are sustaining and life-affirming, propelling them into a glorious and optimistic future. But (if you’re anything like the Gay Uncle) right about now, you’re overwhelmed by a sense of disappointment that things did not go at all how you wanted or expected them to. G.U. feels your pain (he hid in the bathroom and cried at his Bar Mitzvah for just this reason.) In fact, he wants to share, even revel in it. Send him your stories of Mother’s Day TRIUMPH and DESPAIR. The winning story in each category wins!
-For TRIUMPH, the prize is an inscribed personalized copy of his book The Gay Uncle’s Guide to Parenting.
-And since he believes in projecting pain outward, for DESPAIR, it’s a personalized Gay Uncle-authored email, sent directly to your partner and/or kids, calling them on the carpet for ruining your one special day.
Have at it in COMMENTS below.
It’s my first Mother’s Day and what do I get? 2 1- pound bags of Reece’s Pieces. This happens to be my favorite candy, but 2 pounds worth? This gift comes after announcing to my husband that I had not only lost all the baby weight (this happened within a few months of the blessed event) but I was within close range of what I consider my “Skinny Weight: Numbers Only Seen by Sorority Sisters and Hollywood Types.”
I would have been able to drown my disappointment in a bowl of the most perfect peanut butter candy ever, but my husband quickly fessed up to his attempt at buying me a new pair of (fashionably priced) jeans with Amex points. God bless ’em, you can buy anything with those points these days. He had brand, color and style, but lacked my size and the good sense to go look in my closet at the 52 other pair of jeans and check their label for the size. What was more important to me than the jeans, was that my husband had actually heard me say that I had entered a weight class worthy of designer denim, and tried to make it happen. See, sometimes husbands do pay attention their wives non-stop chatter.
So I already have the book, but can I join the despair ranks anyway. Someone’s gotta listen.
My husband, in a motorcycle riding class all weekend. My mother’s day weekend was spent alone with the kids. Sure 5 year old son came home with crafts and all that from preschool. but real gift has been ordered. Arriving “sometime” in the next week. It better be good.
Having an entire weekend husband free ain’t fun unless your kid-less.
My mother picked mother’s day to pack up her stuff and move to parts unknown. My brother showed up at the house with flowers; no one was there except the dogs.